All posts tagged pain

You can still be free

It’s funny how some songs find you, once long lost they make their way back to your ears, for what ever reason they replay within the walls of your mind as the mundane tasks progress and life ticks forward.

This song’s lyrics are so powerful, more powerful perhaps for their undercurrent meaning.  We get lost even though we seem found, we can feel sadness within the happiest setting and physical pain because our heart is hurting, our hearts are missing a piece, our souls tortured.

No matter how dark it all seems time will always set us free, even when all hope is lost light will find its way of breaking through… if you want it to, if you are willing to keep flying for just a little while longer.

I’ve met many people who perpetually say that life is shit, that life is pointless, that nothing good ever happens to them to the point that when good comes their way it is as if the night turns a darker shade of black.  Nothing is good enough, no human can do anything right, nothing is worth anything except personal gain and even then it isn’t seen as such.

When these people realise the damage they have caused to others, not only others but to themselves as well, they can get stuck in the thought process of “even if I change, what is the point, who will be left to see the new me? Who will still want to talk to me?”. Shame and darkness invades once more but the truth is that those that count do see, do care and will be filled with true happiness at their shrugging the cloak of darkness. Vicious circles of night in a daylight filled world.

My wish for those people and for everyone is that they keep on flying, fly high up into the sky and keep flapping those wings… time always sets us free if we believe.

Cool breeze and autumn leaves
Slow motion daylight
A lone pair of watchful eyes
Oversee the living
Feel the presence all around
A tortured soul
A wound unhealing
NO regrets or promises
The past is gone
But you can still be free
If time will set you free

Time now to spread your wings
To take to flight
The life endeavor
Aim for the burning sun
You’re trapped inside
But you can still be free
If time will set you free
But it’s a long long way to go

Keep moving way up high
You see the light
It shines forever
Sail through the crimson skies
The purest light
The light that sets you free
If time will set you free

Sail through the wind and rain tonight
You’re free to fly tonight
And you can still be free
If time will set you free
And going higher than mountain tops
And go high LIKE THE WIND DON`T STOP
And go high
Free to fly tonight
Free to fly tonight

4 Comments
by Sanity on February 9, 2009  •  Permalink
Posted in Humans, Life's Lessons, Songs with Substance, Therapy
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Posted by Sanity on February 9, 2009

http://sanityfound.wordpress.com/2009/02/09/you-can-still-be-free/

Life Uncommon

remoteImage-25This morning I read Liar (Part One ) by Sweetiegirlz (Thanks Pat) and this song started  playing in my head, over and over again, it played.  The lyrics are that which I wish I could sing to all children who find themselves in scary times, times of abuse, poverty, sadness and horror. Instead I sing it to the world in hope that it hears me, hears the message of hope, of hanging on and fighting for another day.

Perhaps I am a bit nostalgic, perhaps I am now just able to sit back and look at the big full picture and see all the puzzle pieces come together like a huge patch work quilt.

Sometimes the little girl within cries, she cries for a childhood she never got to have, for the love she never had and for the injustice of it all.

Sometimes that little girl reaches out and plays with other kids as if she were them, their age, giggling, laughing and doing duck walks.

Sometimes she cries for the other little kids she can’t help or save from the pain.

See, I know I can’t save anyone and most definitely I won’t be able to save all the children in this world nor will I be able to ever prevent the horrors they go through… but… perhaps we can show them that it is possible to survive, that it is possible to be all that you want to be, to break free and show them the strength that lies within them.

I wish I was a superhero not for the fame but rather just so that I would be able to zoom all of these kids to a better safer place… hmm and no there would be no underwear on top!

So to all those who have experienced hard times, trauma, harsh pasts, abuse of any kind… tell your stories, share your experiences and set your words free for they will show others that no matter what it’s possible to live, to survive and to rebuild themselves.

If you don’t want to do it on your current blog create a separate one, do what ever you need to do just get it off your chest and into the sphere… each word saves a life, that is fact and I am testament to it.

don’t worry mother, it’ll be alright
and don’t worry sister, say your prayers and sleep tight
it’ll be fine lover of mine
it’ll be just fine

lend your voices only to sounds of freedom
no longer lend your strength to that which you wish to be free from
fill your lives with love and bravery
and you shall lead a life uncommon

I’ve heard your anguish,
I’ve heard your hearts cry out
we are tired, we are weary, but we aren’t worn out
set down your chains, until only faith remains
set down your chains

and lend your voices only to sounds of freedom
no longer lend your strength to that which you wish to be free from
fill your lives with love and bravery
and we shall lead a life uncommon

there are plenty of people who pray for peace
but if praying were enough it would have come to be
let your words enslave no one and the heavens will hush themselves
to hear our voices ring out clear
with sounds of freedom
sounds of freedom

come on you unbelievers, move out of the way
there is a new army coming and we are armed with faith
to live, we must give
to live

and lend our voices only to sounds of freedom
no longer lend our strength to that which we wish to be free from
fill your lives with love and bravery
and we shall lead…

lend our voices only to sounds of freedom
no longer lend our strength to that which we wish to be free from
fill your lives with love and bravery

7 Comments
by Sanity on December 2, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in blog reviews, Life's Lessons, Songs with Substance
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Posted by Sanity on December 2, 2008

http://sanityfound.wordpress.com/2008/12/02/life-uncommon/

Working winter to enjoy the Summer

I don’t know about you, but I suffer from the Winterassgrowth disease, yip you know the one where you get all cosy, eat more, less exercise and just be, that one.  Much like a squirrel storing its supplies for hibernation our bodies tend to hit this mode, anything we eat it keeps some back in “supplies” to keep our bodies warm.

So if you are like me then ten to one you don’t tend to work out or exercise as hard during winter as you would in summer.  First hint of summer and we go “oh bleep” and start a mad rush to get in shape so that we can fit back into our summer clothes.  Pure incredible madness.

image

In emotions it is much the same.  During the winter, sad, depressing, rough times in our lives we tend to bury ourselves much like that squirrel in hope of sunshine.  We build our defences, erect our walls, turn people away and run from our problems in hope that they would just disappear in our melancholy.  We spend our time coping, surviving and keeping warm, not working out our emotional muscles, learning from the experience and breathing.  We stop breathing.

Both you and I know our problems never just go away, if we don’t deal with our pasts, our issues or learn the lessons that need to be learnt they come back to bite us on our asses. We both know that they bite hard when they do and ten to one its during a glorious summer.  Because we never faced what we needed to, because we ran away instead of facing everything head on our summer days are shortened and tarnished with winter rains.

What if while going through a really rough time we hold on tight, we hang in there, we face the things that come our way and we breathe…

image

What if we worked out during winter, would this give us more time to enjoy the summer?

No matter how far we run from our problems they always find us like the genie in the bottle just waiting for that “rub” to pop out and throw everything back at your feet to deal with.

The sooner you deal with Winter the sooner you will be able to enjoy a true summer…

… breathe.

10 Comments
by Sanity on November 8, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in Humans, Life's Lessons, Life's opinion, Therapy
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Posted by Sanity on November 8, 2008

http://sanityfound.wordpress.com/2008/11/08/working-winter-to-enjoy-the-summer/

The Life of TIK

Jani just turned 43, she has 5 children and is the sole bread winner for her family.  Each day she goes to homes to clean in order to make enough money to feed her children and to put them through school.  Her eldest, Ami, was just 21 when a friend of hers uttered the words “Come on just one hit, feel what I feel, it will take all your worries away”.  She took the hit and her life will never be the same again.

She is now 24 married with a child but her story is far more dark than the surface belays.  Tik is the drug of choice in Cape Town and is gaining popularity country wide.  Made from a mix of over the counter drugs including normal sinus medication it is cheap and therefore more accessible to the general public, especially the poorer communities.

It grabs you and holds you captive much like Heroin, first hit and you are hooked, it brings you heaven and then hell.  It sucks your body dry and at the same time alters your personality so much that you lose hold of love or hope, emotions don’t exist further than your next hit. 

It took a weekend filled with Tik, rape, gang rape and more drugs for Ami to eventually crawl home to her more than distraught family and plead with them to help her.  She said she would go clean but knew she couldn’t do it alone, the pull was too strong, so she got her parents to book her into a facility.  Her parents took her in their arms and carried her to the rehab which cost R250. 3 days work for her mother, 3 days of food away from the other kids but they did it because they loved their daughter as if their own lives depended on it.  The family all started pulling together to the point that even the young ones tried to do extra odd jobs to bring in more money to help Ami.

Eventually after a lot of trauma Ami was released, she was stronger, brighter and she was clean.  Soon other families heard of her healing and sought her out to speak to their children, friends of friends spoke with her and heard her story.  Her story is unknown to many but it needs to be told for it holds so much hope, so much truth of the reality in Tik use and what it does not only to the user but the very people they love.

Her story needs to be told along with all other Tik survivors, the story must get out in order for it to help more people. Families who have been touched by Tik both in the present and past need to hear it. Users both present and past need to hear the story so that they can see that it is possible to come through the other side and breathe, that they do have a choice and that they can do it.

I spoke to Jani today and I told her this, I told her that her daughter is an inspiration, that she and her family are inspirations.  I then told her that there are so many out there with similar stories, if we could find them and get them to write down their stories perhaps they could save more lives.  So we agreed again.  She is now going to speak to the other families and the ex users and ask them if they would like to write about their experiences.  The ex users about their experiences, how they got started, what happened during using and how they got clean.  Their families about what it did to them, how they handled it, what they would’ve done differently and how it felt to have their family member back home.

This book will start out just being about Tik but I feel that it can also move into all drugs, stories of surviving and coming clean, experiences and the truth.

Ultimately about the truth, the whole truth and not the gloss.

I now open it up to you. If you have ever used Tik or any other drug, know of someone who might want to contribute, if you are a family member or friend of someone that is currently or has used in the past we would like to hear from you. If you are interested, want more information or would like to contribute your story you can send an email to sanityf@gmail.com and I will respond respectively.

With your help perhaps we can make a dent in this epidemic…

There is no going back

 

Anti Tik Campaign Short Advert

Unreported World: Lost Generation Pt 1 of 3

Unreported World: Lost Generation P2 of 3

Unreported World: Lost Generation Pt 3 of 3

8 Comments
by Sanity on September 30, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in Friendship, Humans, Life's Lessons, Life's opinion, Recommended, Relationships, Religion & Culture, South Africa, The world around us
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted by Sanity on September 30, 2008

http://sanityfound.wordpress.com/2008/09/30/the-life-of-tik/

F/H: Waxing

*Sent in by Froggywoogie

image My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner,    play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: ‘Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.’

So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. It was one of those ‘cold wax’ kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off.  No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I’m not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!)

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. (‘Cold wax,’ yeah…right!) I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works!!

OK, so it wasn’t the best feeling, but it wasn’t too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.

With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet.  Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it was a long strip).

I inhale deeply and brace myself …….RRRIIIIPPPP!!!!!!!

I’m blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!……OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!!!!

Vision returning, I notice that I’ve only managed to pull off half the strip. CRAP!!!!

Another deep breath and RIPP!!

(more…)

11 Comments
by Sanity on September 23, 2008  •  Permalink
Posted in Fun/Humour
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted by Sanity on September 23, 2008

http://sanityfound.wordpress.com/2008/09/23/waxing/

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