It’s because…

It’s because… I am a woman

It’s because… I am a man

It’s because… I am White

It’s because… I am White-[add country here]

It’s because… I am African

It’s because… I am African-[add country here]

It’s because… I am Asian

It’s because… I am Asian-[add country here]

It’s because… I am Latino

It’s because… I am Latino-[add country here]

It’s because… I come from an abused household

It’s because… I wasn’t loved as a kid

It’s because… I was abandoned

It’s because… I was beaten

It’s because… I was sexually molested

It’s because… I was raped

It’s because… I wasn’t shown how

It’s because… I wasn’t told

It’s because… I come from a poor family

It’s because… I come from a rich family

It’s because… I am sick

It’s because… I am the minority

Choose your excuse

No, I mean no offenceimage

I want to state who I am, what I am and what one of the things I stand for is. I am me, I am a colourless human and I believe in a colourless world.

Each and everyone of us has a burden to bear and bare, each and everyone of us has gone through something.

We all have the right to be heard and we all have a choice as to what we do with our past, present and future, we choose how we take the punches.

In my life time…

I have met a woman who didn’t let her sex stop her from trying to get a job in a predominantly mans world, she got ragged but at the end of the day the men respected her more for trying. She did not use the excuse “It’s because I am a woman”

I have met a man who dreamt of being a ballerina, he was ripped to shreds by fellow “men”, he would sometimes cry from the pain of exerting himself, proving himself, sometimes he would cry from the jibes. He did it and now he’s doing Swan Lake and the likes there of with a big smile. He never used the excuse “It’s because I am a man”

I know someone who comes from an abused household, this person experienced all four of the legally named abuses… physical, sexual, emotional and abandonment. This person strived hard to make themselves better, both physically and emotionally, they fought hard. Not once did this person turn round when something failed and say “It’s because I was abused as a child”

I know more people than can fit on one hand that have been raped, some more than once. Not once have they turned round and blamed something on those events, they have never said “It’s because I was raped”

There are a number of people that I know who brought themselves up, if not their siblings as well. They weren’t guided by adults or shown how and yet when it comes to doing something for the first time it is them that plunge in first to see how they can fix it/put it together/sort it out. They don’t stand there and say “It’s because I was never shown how”

I know an extremely poor family, 4 kids in school with hardly any money for food never mind all the school clothes or anything else. This person works hard, she gets inventive with cooking bare essentials. She has taught her kids how to knit slippers and socks, they make them and sell them. Not once has she turned round and said “It’s because I am poor that my kids are they way they are” or “It’s because I am poor that I can’t be the best I can be”. Her children are the same, they do not blame their failures on their poverty, they blame their successes on it.

I know a number of extremely rich people, I am talking mega millionaires, some self made and some “old money”. These people have compassion and they aren’t scared to show it, when they do they don’t flaunt it either. They don’t go around parking in No Park zones just because they can, because they drive a Aston Martin or BMW. They don’t throw tantrums when they don’t get a specific product they are looking for. They don’t blame their attitudes on the fact that they have money.

I know a number of really ill people, some days these people can’t get out of bed, they can’t make their own coffee, moving one inch sends them into spirals of agony. Life really throws them a basket full of rotten eggs, doctors, needles, constant pill taking, you name hell and that is that right there. These people don’t blame their moods on their illness, they don’t go around being absolute cows to everyone just because they can, just because they are sick.

I know many minorities, what you would call a minority, previously disadvantaged. They don’t let the colour of their skin stop them from trying something new, they don’t go seeking special treatment just because they are a certain colour. They don’t throw the ancestor card nor do they blame their attitudes on it either. Instead these people strive for true equality, they strive as a human being to better themselves in their own capacity, they do not say “It’s because I was previously disadvantaged”

Blaming things on our pasts, on our circumstances, gets us only so far.

What all of these people have done is take a bad situation and made it good. They have shared their pain, their stories and their goals.

They take the lessons learnt through their pain and reach out to others who are going through it or have gone through something similar. They care, they do not blame.

Each and everyone of us has a burden to bear and bare, each and everyone of us has gone through something.

We all have the right to be heard and we all have a choice as to what we do with our past, present and future, we choose how we take the punches, we choose what we do with them.

To all of you that don’t blame but fight for your own equality in a judgemental world, who do not use the bad things that have happened to you as an excuse to get ahead or to do cruelty, to be an itchy bee, aerosol or anything else… I admire you!

You know who I am, you know how I am, where I am from therefore you must know that I do not judge, I observe, I love but do not hate. If you do not know me then ask.

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18 thoughts on “It’s because…

  1. You Rock!!!!!!! I know those who have been judged… I have been judged and have been the judge… No more… I gave up playing God a while back… He is the only judge and He sees all which we desire within our hearts… this list is real. Full of truths many are too inhibited to seek… you are a blessed angel my friend… thank you for being!

  2. hm…yes i agree with you,i hate it when i have to give a reason,but i say the reason and say it was my fault…so i will make it alright…or it is my responsibility…

  3. OK weird I honestly thought I was going to get hate mail phew

    Enreal – From age 0 we are taught to judge, breaking that mould is one of the most liberating things I have ever experienced though I am not immune I still get caught up in its web. Thank you for your kind words, glad you enjoyed this one.

    Hayden – you may just know a few of these people, actually I am certain you know at least one of them well. They are all incredible, truly!

    Kwoneshe2 – thank you so much 😀

    Froggywoogy – just smile, thank you so much!

    Vishesh – Agreed that is the only way to do it, any other way and we lose out on important lessons

  4. Fantastic! This is your story as much as many of our own; we may have had to face adversity, or still do, but we don’t use it as an excuse to act a certain way toward others, or to get special treatment in how we go through life; we all need to cope with our own set of circumstances, and our lives can NEVER change for the better until a person stops blaming and starts choosing to live life!!! Excellent, my dear…… 🙂

  5. Life’s biggest word is “Choice” it is with everything and anything, it follows us, it is us, we embody it even when we don’t want to! Thanks my dear…

  6. I love this, ISF! You blew me away. I bring my hands together and bow to you ~ my soul hears a gentle yet stern voice from you. Most of us would simply blame but we never noticed how those who lived such darker pasts made the effort to find light in the darkness. Now all I can say is…wow!

  7. Glaize Thanks hun, I am really surprised that everyone likes this post so am kind of speechless – there is always day after night, summer after winter, whether you see it is always our choice… I prefer not to be blind, how bout you?

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