If women ruled the world!

PMS would be a legitimate defense in court. 

Men would get reputations for sleeping around. 

Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in their pockets. 

A man would no longer be considered a “good catch” simply because he is breathing. 

Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal weight standard would increase by 40 pounds. 

Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity. 

“Ms.” Magazine would have an annual swimsuit issue featuring scantily clad male models. 

Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing foods within two hours of bedtime. 

Men would be secretaries for female bosses, working twice as hard for none of the credit.. 

Little girls would read “Snow White and the Seven Hunks” 

Men would earn 70 cents for every dollar women made. 

Men would bring drinks, chips and dip to women watching soap operas. 

Men would HAVE to get Playboy for the articles, because there would be no pictures. 

Men would learn phrases like: “I’m sorry”, “I love you”, “You’re beautiful”, “Of course you don’t look fat in that outfit.” 

Men would be judged entirely by their looks, women by their accomplishments.

Men would sit around and wonder what WE are thinking. 

Men would pay as much attention to their woman as to their car. 

All toilet seats would be nailed down. 

Men would work on relationships as much as they work on their careers. 

TV news segments on sports would never run longer than 1 minute. 

All men would be forced to spend one month in a PMS simulator 

During mid-life crisis, men would get hot-flashes and women would date 19 year olds. 

Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly. 

After a baby is born, men would take a six-week paternity leave to wait on their wives hand and foot. 

For basic training, soldiers would have to take care of a two-year olds for six weeks.

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12 thoughts on “If women ruled the world!

  1. Then I don’t want this world because here the men would be treated as the other and they will feel inferior. Can we not find a way to treat each other as equal persons regardless of gender? Admittedly, the concept of equality is difficult to determine, but I would rather people treat this issue seriously instead of making jokes. Such views of a female centric world, even if presented as humorous, can result to mistaken views regarding what feminism is all about. It shouldn’t be about making females superior to males in any sense, but about equality.

  2. Katie, welcome to my blog and thank you for your comment. Truth in what you say, women are now becoming more equal as the days go by.

    As for making jokes about something that used to be such a core issue… I find that when you use humour to point out the faults or to make people think in a positive way to be more constructive than going around shouting and screaming about the wrongs both done and current in the world.

    For instance, you have electricity in your home? Here when you write an exam for your studdies you get a little piece of paper that says “Please ensure to bring a torch with you while attending class and exams”. Some go to school in the sand and their main distraction is not the other class mates or throwing paper in the air but rather the little big spider trying to crawl on their torn scrambled outdated text book. Seeing the humour within the darkness brings a little bit of light and inspires perhaps just a few more people to do good in the world.

    Perhaps you see it differently, for me, this way it works. Lets talk about gay marriages… what do you think of them?

    Chloe spot on sistah spot on!

  3. OMG….LMAO….I want that bowling alley. How gorgeous is that??

    Jokes are just that, jokes. I have a little saying but I don’t think I should print it in public…..I love this one San. Also love the “hammer!”

  4. hehe. you know that in Sweden there is actually something that is called paternity leave. Minimum two months!! (though not necessarily when the baby is newborn)

    to me this post is.. too much.. the extra wide parking lot for women.. the tool set etc… huh. no I can’t take that. I’m the “man” in our house… 😉

  5. greensquid welcome to my world of insanity… while the world is upside down do you think there is any way to ensure all the politicians fall off as well???

    Joy thanks you glad you enjoyed the joke lol got my back always you do… email me that saying I soooo want to hear it and isnt that bowling alley just to die for!

    Vishesh you are a modern male, the world needs more of you!

    Holeycheese dont let Dude hear about this – yip he told me tonight about Sweden and the laws governing both fathers and mothers, i think its truly incredible! (I also have my own tool box dont tell a soul and its NOT in pink!)

    SI It was indeed intended to be a joke just sometimes people get all serious with its message – humour heals and shows the way, this one for instance we laugh at and have fun but we all know that it has an underlying seriousness… BUT by laughing about it we absorb it better… hmm again I respond half asleep sorry.

    Humour is life for me, love it or leave it… perhaps I shall write a post about this once I wake up lol nn

  6. Well, I thought it was funny and it made good points too. Jokes are jokes and when someone stops making jokes about my blonde hair I’ll assume the world has ended.

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