He said to me . . . I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it. I said to him . . . You wear pants don’t you? He said to me . . ….. Shall we try swapping positions tonight? She said .. That’s a good idea – you stand by the ironing board while I sit on … Continue reading Friday Funnies: He said, She said…
Ms. Smith stopped to reprove Johnny for making faces: “Johnny, when I was small, my mother used to tell me that if I made ugly faces, at some moment it would freeze and stay like that.” Johnny looked up at her and thoughtfully replied: “Well, Ms. Smith, you can’t say you weren’t forewarned.” __________________________________ The teacher asks everyone in the class to demonstrate something exciting. … Continue reading Friday funnies ~ Little Johnny
Two couples were playing poker one evening. Jim accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed Bob’s wife, Sue wasn’t wearing any underwear under her dress! Shocked by this, Jim upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced. Later, Jim went to the kitchen to … Continue reading F/H: Poker
Two women get on an elevator. The first woman reeks of perfume and the second says, “What’s that perfume?” The first responds, “Chanel #5, $99.00 a bottle.” The elevator stops on the fourth floor and another woman boards reeking of perfume. The second woman sniffs the air and the third woman says, “Paradise $149.00 a bottle.” The elevator stops on the sixth floor and the … Continue reading F/H: Perfume…
TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America. MARIA : Here it is! TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America? CLASS : Maria! ____________ TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank? FRANK : Because of the sign. TEACHER : What sign? FRANK : The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.” ____________ TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication … Continue reading Friday Funnies : Why some kids get in trouble in school
It was the end of the school day and all of the kids were anxious to go home. The teacher told the kids,”As soon as you can name the speaker of a famous quote you may leave. O.K., Who said four score and seven years ago?” Johnny lifts his hand in excitement. “Yes, Johnny?”But before he could answer, Lucy jumped in and said Abraham Lincoln.“Very … Continue reading Friday Funny ~ Famous Quotes
Two babies were sitting in their cribs, when one baby shouted to the other, “Are you a little girl or a little boy?” “I don’t know,” replied the other baby giggling. “What do you mean, you don’t know?” said the first baby. “I mean I don’t know how to tell the difference,” was the reply. “Well, I do,” said the first baby chuckling, “I’ll climb … Continue reading Friday Funnies: Boy or a girl?